i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
