Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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