does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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