Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Randomize