is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
