The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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