is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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