When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
