Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
