Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
