So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
