so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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