I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
