apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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