I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize