I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
