Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I am full of burrito and curiosity
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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