But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
