There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
