i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
