I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize