well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
