Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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