One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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