But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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