Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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