he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
