you didnt know i had herpes?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
ok first of all what the fuck
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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