Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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