eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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