Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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