What a fucking waste of an outfit
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
