Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
