I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
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