he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sobbing to NWA
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize