love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
