She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
