Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
