I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Randomize
