I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
