i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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