I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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