Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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