Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
