playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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