she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I need to sanitize my soul.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
