he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Randomize
