I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
