Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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