Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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