you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it