imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
